I just read and electronically signed my first publishing contact. What does this mean? Well, I have to get a revised manuscript of Spirit of the Lone Horse done and to the publisher by April 2014, so it can be published by August 2014. Of course, my goal is to beat at least the April deadline.

The cover may change, but the reality remains the same. Me, a published author.

The cover may change, but the reality remains the same. Me, a published author.

Published. The word has so many meanings and emotions attached to it for me. Right now, there are about half a dozen people that I’ve lost track of that I wish I could email or phone and tell them, “See I’m not the fantasy living dreamer you think I am because I’m actually making my dreams a reality.” Others, closer and still talking with, I just want to keep quiet with until I have the book in my hand.

I’m not so sure exactly how I feel. Excited, but a tempered excited. More relieved than anything else, I guess. The fight / struggle is not over by a long shot, but at least, there is someone out there who is willing to give me a chance (and the support) for my voice to be heard. I know I have a lot of work ahead of me, but I also know this isn’t a false start. I can finally say “Self, see, the fight was worth it.” I’m also going to have to be on my own ass to get it done because there is going to days, maybe even weeks, where I don’t want to write for whatever reason. I can’t afford that luxury any more. If I, and the world, am going to take me seriously as a writer than I need to write.

But just knowing that my words, my characters, my story is going to come alive outside my head, finally, is enough for now.